1950's Films: Style With Purpose

Number 18 on my list is to watch my list of classic films, the entirety of which I will not clutter up space with right now. The first two on my list happened to both be films from the 50's, 12 Angry Men and The African Queen. Both of which I highly recommend. Henry Fonda stars in the 1957 drama of 12 Angry Men about a jury deliberating over a murder trial. 11 men say he's guilty on the first vote and one man says he's not sure and wants to talk it through first. Slowly Fonda introduces doubt into the jurors to the point that a previously slam dunk conviction became a unanimous innocent verdict. Humphrey Bogart and Katharine Hepburn star in The African Queen (54) about a riverboat captain and a missionary in Africa at the beginning of WWI who decide to torpedo a German ship. Like witty banter? This is the classic hate-love story of opposites attracting with hilarious arguments and great repartee.

On the surface both of these films are surprisingly simple. 12 Angry Men takes place in mostly one room, the jury room, in black and white. No explosions or car chases-- just 12 men in one room debating and arguing. And the African Queen takes place on one boat, with mainly two people in the African jungle. Yet somehow in both movies I was spellbound; the simplicity transformed the final effect into something complex and profound. Twelve men from all different backgrounds come together to discuss life and death in a very immediate and personal way. It was stunning to watch as one by one, each man was persuaded to see the reasonable doubt from their various perspectives. How often when we come together do we give each other the opportunity to explain our perceptions? The movie was less about one boy on trial in New York City and more about each one of us judging each other- putting our neighbors on trial and convicting them without hearing the defense. And in the African Queen, it was beautiful to watch two people fall in love while stuck on a boat. There were no fancy dinners or roses, no poetry, no other contending suitors-no other people really or cute dates. How often do we make dating about the things we do rather than the people we do them with? (Hint: Men- we don't want roses and steak. When we love you, even when we just like you, we just want you.)

Today in movies everything is larger than life- Transformers, seven minute long car chases, the magical look and boom! you're in love moments, Tron, double double crossings and secret identities. Most movies today are about the special effects- how big, how bad can you make it? But isn't film supposed to provoke thought and re-evaluation of some aspect, more than our cars or if our neighbor might be CIA....? Now, I'm not even close to finishing my film list and I wouldn't call myself an expert on 1950's films, but somehow I think the minimalist style makes the viewer do the bulk of the thinking work with subtle hints and unsaid ideas. What do you think?

Watch for my adventure into the artwork of Carl Bloch and my exploration into quilting coming soon!

Operation Amazon Warrior

I am a strong woman. No apologies for that. Recently, a friend on mine recommended a book, The List, that gave me an idea. In the book, the woman makes a list of things to do before she gets married to prevent herself from marrying too young and (in her mind) not living her own life. That's not my worry. My list is to keep me preoccupied from being lonely and it has already proven to be interesting.( And this is separate from my overall bucket list) So here it is.

- Live alone in an apartment/house
- Learn how to change a tire and basic car maintenance
- Own my own tool set
- Have a dog
- Learn how to make sushi
- Run a marathon
- Learn basic figure skating tricks
- Learn “ I love you” in 50 languages (working on it)
- Learn to play the piano fluently
- Go skydiving
- Go bungee jumping
- Visit the Seven Wonders of the World
- Visit Disney World
- Have my own garden
- Publish my book (almost there)
- Make my own quilts- jean quilt
- Read my classics list
- Watch classic and international films list (quite fascinating)
- Buy a great piece of art
- Invest in the stock market
- Watch the sunset on every coast in each country I visit
- See a Broadway play
- Attend a Yankees game
- Attend a Superbowl (incredibly difficult)
- Climb a volcano- Paricutin
- Ride a gondola in Venice

Wish me luck!

I Am A Survivor

Wow. What a month it has been since I last blogged! I'm not the kind of blogger to tell you about going to the zoo on Saturday or a bad day at work (even if I did have them) or all of my deep dark emotions. But, this past month- six weeks have been incredibly difficult. In fact, the past six months have quite possibly been the trial of my life so far. And I'm still alive to type about it. Point for me.

I'm sure many of you have been there-- that point when you think you have nothing left to give, or when you think the grief and anger cripple you so entirely you can't hold onto a happy thought. The days you get up and try to get ready only to crawl back into bed after your roommates have left for the day. And in all honesty, to all you fellow brave souls out there who are nodding at all the above sentiments, it's okay to admit that it's hard. I'm doing everything in my power to exercise faith and optimism, reading my scriptures, attending the temple, praying, etc and it is still hard. People ask how your day was and you hesitate, trying to decide if you should tell them that today was hard, just like yesterday, and that tomorrow will be difficult as well...it sounds negative, doesn't it? But let me tell you, admitting the bad and hard emotions is not a weakness, it's a strength. Having the courage to acknowledge that you are hurt or angry takes more courage than masking it all behind a false smile. Don't get me wrong- I'm not saying that one can't be optimistic in hard times, just not insincerely. I do not want to find myself in relationships where the entire range of emotions are not dealt with- where people want to find a quick fix to make everything ok instead of helping me work through it, where friends can be there for the triumphs but not for the tears. Now is not the day for fair-weather friends; life is too hard and short to spend alone and too beautiful and wonderful not to be shared, all of it. Now is the day when the rubber meets the road and you decide if you really believe it.

And guess what?
I do.

I believe that true love exists, that people are basically good, that we all make mistakes and all deserve forgiveness, that faith makes a difference, that prayers are heard, that gratitude is divine, that 19 year old young men around the world can change lives, that revelation to people like me and you is not only possible but a daily reality, and that all of these experiences are to instruct and stretch my soul. " The soul is like a violin string- it only makes music when stretched." To all you fighters out there- you are a survivor too.