A Powerful and Humbling Week

Dearest Family!

Hello from the MTC!! Thank you so much for your letters this week! Recieving them all together like that was wonderful and I poured over them. Dad- I hope you are going better and please know that you are in my every prayer. As is the rest of the family, not in a homesick way, but in the manner that I trust my Heavenly Father to watch over and protect you. Mom- thanks for keeping me humble : ) Jason- Chocolate chip cookie. Sheena- Did the Primary get my card I sent them yet? I sent it to Sister Drummond. Mom, Camber and Cody- I have a special letter I'm sending today for you to share in young women's over a special lesson I learned this week.

Onto the joys of this week!!!!!!!! There are so many I may run out of time. I mentioned Hermana Ruiz last week and discovered that she was in fact our other teacher, Hermana Tartaglia. I absolutely love her. She has the gift of bringing the Spirit into a lesson. Last weekend when I was having a hard time with something she pulled me out of class to make sure I was alright. She told me things I knew Heavenly Father needed her to tell me. She told me that when I was teaching the gospel to Hermana Ruiz she thought I was absolutely beautiful. Now, I might consider myself acceptably attractive usually, but when I teach the gospel I feel beautiful. The light of the gospel has the effect on each of us I believe. This week we also started with two new investigators, Juan and Maria. It is a beautiful and wonderful experience to prepare as much as I can, pray for the Spirit, and to feel to power of the Spirit bringing words to my remembrance or prompting me to share certain scriptures or thoughts. I truly feel like I'm becoming an instrument in God's hands. See Alma 17:10-11.

Last Sunday I was called as the coordinating sister for my zone, meaning I'm responsible for all the sisters in the zone and report directly to the branch president. It has been an uplifting and wonderful blessing to serve in this capacity so far. We welcomed three new sisters this week and on this next tuesday Hermana Tanner will depart for the CCM in Guatemala. Pray for her to arrive safely please. Not only do I love helping the new sisters (and elders) settle in and teaching them of the first lessons on companions, goals, and personal study- I love serving with my two zone leaders, Elder Pliler and Elder Burke. They are wonderful men and we balance each other out, or compliment each other.

We've had some wonderful speakers this week and I don't have enough time to give all the details, so look for more details in my upcoming letters home. On Sunday night, President and Sister Daines of the Provo temple spoke to us about the temple and specifically about how the temple prepare and assists in the missionary work. It was a unique environment of completely endowed members of the church- I don't think there is another place besides in the temple that you know every single participant in endowed. Given the setting, President Daines had been given special permission to speak fairly boldly and he emphasized that every single thing/symbol/ etc in the temple points to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. So this morning as our district attended the temple, having sought out symbols of Christ in our scripture study this week, it was a powerful and humbling experience in the temple. Words cannot describe the absolute joy that fills my soul in the temple and as I learn more each time I attend. After the devotional last Sunday, we watched a talk by Elder Bednar given here in the MTC entitled "The Character of Christ" . He said " There would have been no atoning sacrifice without the character of Christ." Among the many attributes of the Savior he focused on the fact that the Savior TURNS OUT, when the rest of us would turn in. He is forever reaching out to others even in his moments of need. Re-read Matthew 4:11 and look under Joseph Smith translation. Angels were not ministering to Christ, rather He sent them to minister to John the Baptist. This kind of "turning out" will enable us to be converted unto the Lord, not just to gain a testimony. Our conversion in this marvelous gospel must be to the Lord, not to our transitory leaders and friends, not only to how things are in the Church, but converted unto the knowledge that we trust in the Lord to shape us within his gospel. I could go on for hours on what I learned....but Elder Rasband of the presidency of the Seventy came on Tuesday and spoke powerfully over the Spirit in our lives. His wife's talk really touched my heart as she that we must leave the worldly identifies and accolades at the door and go forth to serve, not as the world might label us, but how the Lord sees us. I know this gospel is true without a shadow of a doubt in my soul. Jesus is the Christ, our Savior and Redeemer.

Love,

Hermana Koerner

May 18th

Hello Mom, Dad, and family!!

I can honestly say this is the best thing I've ever done in my whole life and I'm only ten days into it! There is so much to tell you and we only have half an hour- so throughout the week I've been making little notes of things I wanted to share with all of you. First, Hermana Aguilar moved up to the advanced district which was probably the best thing for her. Hermana Tanner and I miss her, but are loving the time we have to work together. They both leave in 10 more days, Hermana Tanner to the MTC in Guatemala and Hermana Aguilar directly to Honduras! Before I was a little nervous about being a single sister in my zone with five other elder (another elder is also leaving for the Guatemala MTC), but this week we've bonded. We''ve set goals as a district, including reading the Book of Mormon completely in Spanish before leaving the MTC. Every night before planning, we read a chapter aloud in Spanish and the Spirit just envelopes us. I feel like I have six extra little brothers ( Don't worry, Jason- you're still my best and favorite brother ever!!!!). As we''ve studied, worked, testified, taught, and discussed together we''ve become a solid unit. They have their immature moments, sure, but these elders have strong testimonies of the gospel and know why they are serving the Lord. I am so grateful for their wonderful example of bearing the priesthood. Speaking of priesthood, Elder L. Tom Perry was our devotional speaker this past Tuesday and he spoke about the restoration of the priesthood. More than his stories and lesson, his presence and testimony filled the auditorium. I sat not 20 feet away from an Apostle of the Lord. I''ve also learned here that as a missionary, I am an apostle (with a little a) of the Lord charged with a sacred responsibility to testify of Christ. A scripture emphasized in our zone in 3 Nephi 5:13 simply put, it declares that we are disciples of Christ called to declare his word to all the people that they might receive eternal life.

Sunday was truly a tender mercy of the Lord, after several days of constant work here. In our branch everyone prepares  a 3-5 min talk on the predetermined topic (in Spanish of course) and several are called on in the meeting to speak. It''s great practice and we are writing talks we can keep for our missions on the core elements of the gospel. I''m also grateful I already had some prepared. Sunday night''s fireside speaker was Brother Heaton, an administrative director of the MTC. His devotional was incredibly powerful over striving for real growth (active church members, deep testimonies, and temple covenants) in the Church and by using the principle of looking to the Savior to increase real growth. I could write a whole letter over his talk alone.

It is difficult to find the right words to describe the feeling of the Spirit here at the MTC. One leader described it as there is so much Spirit here, it spills out the doors and windows and pours over the surrounding fences. The power of the Spirit is incredible and has comforted and guided me more than once. Though each day is better than the last, there have been tough moments and I have turned to the Lord. My prayers have become ruegos ( a beautiful Spanish word roughly translated as a pleading of the heart) and I have felt my Heavenly Father''s arms wrap around me in such times. Moments of frustration or sadness are short-lived here however, because it is swallowed up in the joy of the message we are learning and teaching. For example, we have been teaching a Hermana Ruiz since our 2nd day here ( we don''t know if she is a volunteer, actor, or a teacher). Hermana Tanner and I have worked to teach simple and beautiful lessons over the gospel and to show her how much Heavenly Father loves her. No matter ""who"' she actually is, I felt God''s love for her so powerfully throughout our lessons. Yesterday, being the day before preparation day was difficult as we were all exhausted from a week of constant studying and class time. Yet as we taught Hermana Ruiz and invited her to be baptized, she accepted!!!!! Such joy filled our hearts and I can't wait to share this wonderful news of the gospel with everyone in Texas. I''m out of time, but I hope this letter is better than my last when things were a bit jumbled.

I love you all and know I am about the Lord's work.

Love, Hermana Koerner

Good morning!
        It is such a beautiful feeling to wake up each morning and serve the Lord wholeheartedly! I have two companions, Sister Aguilar and Sister Tanner. In three weeks they are heading to Guatemala to finish their training in the CCM there before serving in Honduras. Then I will be a solo sister in our district, but I feel blessed
to have elders that are focused and kind. Though I prepared with the language I feel inadequate at times. But the Spirit reminded me yesterday that I have a testimony- I know this Church is true and the Joseph Smith was a prophet. I know the Book of Mormon is true. I know who I am and where I'm going. My testimony gives me such joy that I have to share it and I will not allow the language barrier or my lack of ability stop me from doing so. That is why I'm here to invite others to come to Christ and I know the Spirit will help me. Because we are doing so much everyday I'm not even sure what all to tell everyone. Please tell me what you want to know about my time here. A few things- my preparation day will normally be on Friday and our branch president suggested that you send letters through DearElder.com since it sends a hard copy in the mail the next day, even if it is days before my preparation day.
I love you with all my heart and hope you are doing well!
-Sister Koerner

P.S. Forgive me if I have Spanglish in my letters- my mind is trying really hard to translate everything into Spanish. : )

First Week in the MTC

                                                                                                                                      Sent  May 12


I can honestly say this is the best thing I've ever done in my whole life and I'm only ten days into it! There is so much to tell you and we only have half an hour- so throughout the week I've been making little notes of things I wanted to share with all of you. First, Hermana Aguilar moved up to the advanced district which was probably the best thing for her. Hermana Tanner and I miss her, but are loving the time we have to work together. They both leave in 10 more days, Hermana Tanner to the MTC in Guatemala and Hermana Aguilar directly to Honduras! Before I was a little nervous about being a single sister in my zone with five other elder (another elder is also leaving for the Guatemala MTC), but this week we've bonded. We''ve set goals as a district, including reading the Book of Mormon completely in Spanish before leaving the MTC. Every night before planning, we read a chapter aloud in Spanish and the Spirit just envelopes us. I feel like I have six extra little brothers ( Don't worry, Jason- you're still my best and favorite brother ever!!!!). As we''ve studied, worked, testified, taught, and discussed together we''ve become a solid unit. They have their immature moments, sure, but these elders have strong testimonies of the gospel and know why they are serving the Lord. I am so grateful for their wonderful example of bearing the priesthood. Speaking of priesthood, Elder L. Tom Perry was our devotional speaker this past Tuesday and he spoke about the restoration of the priesthood. More than his stories and lesson, his presence and testimony filled the auditorium. I sat not 20 feet away from an Apostle of the Lord. I''ve also learned here that as a missionary, I am an apostle (with a little a) of the Lord charged with a sacred responsibility to testify of Christ. A scripture emphasized in our zone in 3 Nephi 5:13 simply put, it declares that we are disciples of Christ called to declare his word to all the people that they might receive eternal life.
Sunday was truly a tender mercy of the Lord, after several days of constant work here. In our branch everyone prepares  a 3-5 min talk on the predetermined topic (in Spanish of course) and several are called on in the meeting to speak. It''s great practice and we are writing talks we can keep for our missions on the core elements of the gospel. I''m also grateful I already had some prepared. Sunday night''s fireside speaker was Brother Heaton, an administrative director of the MTC. His devotional was incredibly powerful over striving for real growth (active church members, deep testimonies, and temple covenants) in the Church and by using the principle of looking to the Savior to increase real growth. I could write a whole letter over his talk alone.
It is difficult to find the right words to describe the feeling of the Spirit here at the MTC. One leader described it as there is so much Spirit here, it spills out the doors and windows and pours over the surrounding fences. The power of the Spirit is incredible and has comforted and guided me more than once. Though each day is better than the last, there have been tough moments and I have turned to the Lord. My prayers have become ruegos ( a beautiful Spanish word roughly translated as a pleading of the heart) and I have felt my Heavenly Father''s arms wrap around me in such times. Moments of frustration or sadness are short-lived here however, because it is swallowed up in the joy of the message we are learning and teaching. For example, we have been teaching a Hermana Ruiz since our 2nd day here ( we don''t know if she is a volunteer, actor, or a teacher). Hermana Tanner and I have worked to teach simple and beautiful lessons over the gospel and to show her how much Heavenly Father loves her. No matter ""who"' she actually is, I felt God''s love for her so powerfully throughout our lessons. Yesterday, being the day before preparation day was difficult as we were all exhausted from a week of constant studying and class time. Yet as we taught Hermana Ruiz and invited her to be baptized, she accepted!!!!! Such joy filled our hearts and I can't wait to share this wonderful news of the gospel with everyone in Texas. I''m out of time, but I hope this letter is better than my last when things were a bit jumbled.
I love you all and know I am about the Lord's work.

Love, Hermana Koerner

Mission Goals

Good morning!
An especially good morning since it's my first as an official sister missionary. I fly out today and enter the MTC on the 9th. Anyone looking for addresses- they are posted on the right side of the blog. Welcome to my blog- if this is one of your first visits! And if you are a loyal reader from before- thanks for continuing to read! Just a heads up- my family is all named with nicknames to protect their privacy. Please don't leave comments with their real names out of respect for them. If I use your name or story and you'd prefer I didn't, please leave a comment and *Bella(my younger sister who will be managing the blog for me) will make the necessary changes.

I must express my sincere gratitude for all the love and support that both Terre Haute wards poured out over me and for the support of my family- immediate and extended. I held strong through both talks in church, my open house, and the various farewell phone calls. But I'll admit to crying a bit when my beautiful Primary children (of whom I have been the chorister of for the past 8-9 months) surprised me with homemade cards and pictures. Some of the wonderful boys left me memorable lines such as- " Don't get eaten by an alligator.", " Watch out for wild things." and " Don't step on snakes 'cause they don't like it." Serving in Primary was the most humbling and inspiration call I think I could have held before my mission and I'm grateful for those experiences.

I've been thinking seriously the past few months or so about the goals I want to have for my mission, because I'm a goal type woman. The written down, posted, revised, and analyzed kind of goal woman- something that is coming with me into the mission field. The Relief Society declaration reminds us that "our lives have meaning, purpose, and direction..." at every stage of womanhood and I am grateful for the chance to discover all of those more in depth as a sister missionary. I've talked with mentors, friends, returned missionaries, and family members to help me develop the goals I want to strive for throughout my mission. Here is a list of the ones I've compiled. They will probably change, in fact, I hope they do change since that means I will be growing and progressing. But a starting place is nice.

Make morning prayer my first spiritual experience of the day, but make sure it is not my last. ( Advice from my father)
Faithfully keep a journal throughout my mission and strive to write every day.
To adhere to the advice of President Monson when he said, "Pray as though everything depends upon God. Work as though everything depends upon you..."
To work within the wards that I serve in, in such a way that all of the members (not just investigators, WML's, and converts) feel of my love for them and my desire to serve them.
To help those I teach apply the doctrines to their everyday lives.
To be able to teach the gospel in all of it's remarkable simplicity while striving to learn of the mysteries I have not yet gained knowledge of.
Learn something from each of my companions. Indeed, to seek out everything they can teach me during our service together.
To become intimately acquainted with the Spirit. ( Advice from my mother.)
Use the Book of Mormon in every aspect of the work.
Seek to continually serve my companion.
To sustain and encourage the priesthood holders I will work with.
Identify the Christ-like attributes in all those meet and serve with.
Love the gospel, love my companion, and love the people. ( Advice from Emilee and H.)
Spend 10 more seconds listening with people I meet to try to really get to understand what they are saying and what they need.
To find balance even within the rigorous demands of missionary life.
To not waste a single referral, lesson, moment, or day of my mission. That I may look back on my mission and say that I gave everything I could possibly give.
I know with all of my heart that I am not serving this mission on my own, but with my Heavenly Father's guidance. It is His gospel I am sharing, His love I am emulating, and His children I am serving.

All my love and excitement-
Sister Koerner

Finding Isaiah

I'm taking a break from packing up all my stuff, so I can post. Some of you might remember I took an Understanding Isaiah class at BYU last year, which I absolutely loved! At the end of the semester we did a final creative project expressing our exploration of the book of Isaiah. Being a writer, my project took the form of a poem. Here it is.

Finding Isaiah

My flickering batteries are dying,

and the textbooks before me are creased

with notes and assignments.

One task remains, yet left deliberately

for the end with trepidation in my heart.

It's Isaiah, the poet of the plates.

Yet so far removed from my small

apartment and Life.

I need the promised guidance,

yet the screen oft times hinders.

Behind the Master, his words stand apart,

For even He says study of his teachings.

Over and over again the words form, but

stop making meaning somewhere between

the page and my brain,

the page and amy heart.

Now that I have started to search

I see Isaiah all around,

In the words of the following prophets,

Teachers and knowledge.

They all have glimpsed his light

which seems to only flicker before me.

What is he saying?

What does it mean?

Why should it matter to me?

It mattered to Nephi and Mosiah,

Joseph and Jesus,

so what escapes me?

Am I unlearned?

Unworthy?

Am I not ready for the poet of the plates?

How can I find him when I myself am lost?

Isaiah could not possibly know of my

pain and struggles,

my heartaches and loneliness.

He knows of deserts and of kings,

of armies and temples.

He knows of waters and mountains,

of marriage and children.

So how then can I see him?

Leaving the pages laid out

 I fall to my knees in tears.

Can I please know?

Can Babylon, Judah, Israel, and Samaria

translate to ideals beyond the boundary?

What work lies on my shoulders

and what lays with the Lord?

The room fades away as the

pages come into focus.

I see a Mirror with myself

reflected in the verses.

I see a Warning against my

failings and sins.

I see a Calling to join the ranks

and fulfill my commission.

I see a Father.

Powerful and wise.

Loving and merciful.

A Father who hears my pleading words,

and feels my aching heart.

 A Father who knows me beyond my very mind

and loves me beyond my every flaw.

I see a Son.

A Savior and Redeemer.

Who in patience will teach me,

in humility will guide me.

Who in love will chastise me,

in joy will comfort me.

Who in obedience will save me.

I thought I was looking for

the mysteries and secrets of his pages.

Instead I discovered the mysteries to be

Simple Truths.

Truths covered by intricate veils

yet truth nonetheless.

 

Six days til I fly out! And eight until I enter the MTC!!!