Attitude of Gratitude

I love this time of year, as the crispness of autumn slides into the chilly winter and as the warmth of gratitude from Thanksgiving leads us straight to Christmas. Whereas we are tempted by materialism and selfishness as December approaches, I feel that Thanksgiving itself is largely protected from that.

This morning on my way to work I found my normal route blocked by police officers and road closure signs, so I turned around and tried another route only to find that blocked as well. A drive that takes me a little more than 10 minutes every morning turned into a half hour as I tried various approaches to get to work. Upon arriving I was told the story. A horrific crash occurred this morning around 3 a.m. resulting in 2 fatalities and closing the intersection in all directions, most likely caused by drunk driving. Two families changed forever the day before Thanksgiving.

Life is fragile and precious.

Moments like that remind us of what truly matter most. Not the number of Facebook friends or Twitter followers, not your income or car, and not your clothes or shoes. I may not be with my family this holiday, but I will be with some beloved friends. I may not have many material possessions, but I do have a wonderful job and a continuous education. I've kept a "wall of gratitude" at work this month. Every morning I would come in and pin three blessings to the wall next to my desk. From the big blessings of my family, the temple, and the Atonement all the way to the privilege of voting, feeling pretty, and crisp autumn mornings.

President Monson is always one to be full of gratitude. I love this quote from a 2010 General Conference talk- "We can lift ourselves and others as well when we refuse to remain in the realm of negative thought and cultivate within our hearts an attitude of gratitude. If ingratitude be numbered among the serious sins, then gratitude takes its place among the noblest of virtues. Someone has said that “gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others."

And as we choose to be grateful this season I know we will more instinctively know how give that which is most important as Christmas approaches.

Fresh Sand & Soldiers

After Halloween I get so excited for Thanksgiving since it's my favorite holiday that I forget about the three days of November that expose all the old wounds. And every year they are all together. November 10th is the Marine Corp birthday. Veteran's Day is on November 11th. And November 12th will be the four year anniversary of Andy's* death.

 

Four years.

 

It's like a completely different life, as if I'm a whole other woman. The pain doesn't cripple me anymore, the ache doesn't consume me, and the loneliness isn't the only thing I see in front of me.

 

I remember talking with him about visiting California, about how he'd show me all these cool beaches he liked and how he'd take me to Disneyland for my first time. I had forgotten all about that until I walked the pier today and that conversation flooded back. Guilt came first, but peace followed it. I'm allowed to keep living and just because I had first planned to take all these trips with him, doesn't mean I can't take them at all. Gratitude came next- his sacrifice and the sacrifice of countless others allows me to be free. To take a vacation and try new things, to dance in the tide of the Pacific Ocean for the first time, to scavenge for seashells with the enthusiasm of a child, to delight in the opportunity to indulge my inner Disney princess. In some ways, because Andy gave everything- I am here today. And in others ways, because of Andy- I am who I am today.

 

I watched the tide wash over the sand today and thought about the love of the Savior--how constant, perfect, and unconditional. If we will let it, the healing power of the Atonement will soothe and eventually heal all heartaches, just as the tide smooths the sand across the beach. And in the fresh sand I can make new footprints.

 

"God's light is real. It is available to all! It gives life to all things. It has the power to soften the sting of the deepest wound." -President Uchtdorf

Epigenetics and Excitement

Carrying 14 books out of the library to my car is a bit trickier when they are large textbooks and not small little novels, but it is so worth it. Not the part about where my massage therapist asked me if I am pregnant because I'm reading a book on newborn development. Though it was kind of funny. It's so worth it to get lost in researching, studying, and cross-referencing. I'm such a dork that I've stayed up late every night this week reading child development and psychology texts and making new discoveries by the minute.

One such discovery that has me so intrigued is the field of epigenetics- "epi" coming from the Greek meaning over, outside of and around. Basically how outside factors influence how genes are manifest--"The field of epigenetics teaches us that the way genes function can actually change depending on actions you take, actions your child takes, and ultimately, the environment in which you child grows up" (You Raising Your Child) Wow!

Think about that- the choices you make, both consciously and unconsciously, not only affect your own genetic expression, but that of your children! You can even break down further to the field of nutri-epigenetics- how nutrition effects the activation of alleles in the DNA sequence. There is a really fun website (even if it's from the enemy university) that has videos and interactive modules. You should check it out.

That has some beautiful spiritual parallels. Everything we do affects who we become- our desires, thoughts, words, and actions. A parent's choices and behavior effect the spiritual development of their homes and families just like what we eat effects our health. What spiritual epigenetics do you see in your life?

In other exciting news, I am going on vacation all next week to my new favorite place- California! This time, however, I am going south to the beach and drumroll please....Disneyland! My first time ever to go and my secret Disney Princess identity is starting to come out! I am so excited I'm having trouble concentrating at work (obviously). I am going with some of my favorite people and best friends and I am so ready for some fun, relaxation and adventure.