When Coming Home Feels Like Leaving

For couple weeks now I've been falling asleep expecting to wake up 1000 miles away in my missionary apartment. I put on my jacket and reach to adjust my tag only to realize it's not there. I'm enjoying listening to music and watching shows, but a part of me struggles to justify spending the time to just sit. There is the adjustment to the fact that my little brother is not so little anymore and my baby sister now has a boyfriend!! (Yeah, still not liking that one a lot) I miss Houston and my missionary companions and the wonderful incredible amazing people. Yet, I know I am supposed to be here right now. Sigh.

Life is about change and progression. About taking who I was yesterday, who I am today, and making myself into who I need to become tomorrow. Life is treasuring the gems of today, the tender mercies and tough times, and still looking forward to the future. It's learning when to let go and what to hold onto, and how to know which one. So I'm taking it all with me. My mission has become a huge part of me, but it is not the defining moment, the end all of my progression--it is a stepping stone. 

Coming home has been out of balance for me. During the mission, the scope of areas in your life are more limited. One strives to balance companionship, investigator, and member relationships, learn teaching skills and new languages, deepening spirituality, etc. Most other areas are limited or ignored during this time. Returning brings back to life each of those neglected categories so naturally it takes a little time to find a balance again. I'm ready for the challenge and I'm looking forward to this next stage of my life.

Throughout the process of my mission I was able to heal from many things. More than that, I learned how to heal. I gave burdens to the Lord and felt Him lead me through trials. This is me saying goodbye to everything I was carrying before and saying hello to the beginning of a lifetime pursuit on the path of discipleship. This is me saying thank you and I love you to everyone in the Texas Houston Mission- thank you for all the lessons, the tears, and the laughter. Thank you for molding me into the woman I've become. God be with ya'll til we meet again. 

Til I See You Again